Kim Neville

Happy New Year. Since the year began, I’ve been reading through the novel I finished in November. I got to the end yesterday, and since then have come to some conclusions about my NaNoWriMo experience.

To recap, my novel is 75,000 words. I wrote the first 25K over September and October, and the final 50K in a mad rush in November. (My reasons for doing this are explained here.)

I thought, considering the speed at which I poured the words out, I might be surprised at what I’d written. Not so. The novel reads exactly as I expected. It looks, approximately, like this:

• 80 pages of pretty good stuff (that would be the pre-November writing);
• 50 pages of not so good but fixable stuff;
• 120 pages of unsalvageable crap; and
• 40 pages of story with the potential to be great if it weren’t crammed into 40 pages in a desperate attempt to finish by the end of November.

I knew while I was in the middle that I was descending into crapdom, writing scenes that I’d have to cut later. I kept telling Shane, “I’m so bored writing these scenes,” and he’d say, “Then don’t write them.” But I wrote them anyway; I couldn’t stop myself.

Why? Maybe that was my process. Maybe I needed to write all that crap to get to the heart of the story. Maybe, but I don’t think so. I have to be honest and guess that 1) I was just getting through the words in order to meet my daily quota, and 2) I felt compelled to stick to the stupid outline I threw together just before I headed into NaNoWriMo.

I’m just glad that near the end I figured it out, and abandoned the outline and let my characters go do what they needed to do. (Incidentally, I knew, too, when I stopped writing crap. I knew because writing ceased to be a chore. I was having fun again.)

So would I do NaNoWriMo again? I don’t think so. The experience reaffirmed my stance against outlining. I know it works for lots of writers. I’m not one of them. And my brain’s just not quick enough to write that many words in such a short time without a plan. I need time for contemplation. Next time, I’ll take it slower.

For now, my path is clear. As soon as I post this, I’m going in and cutting the entire middle out. About half the novel, I’d guess. That’s a lot of lost words, but I’m not sad to see them go. Really, they’re so painful to read I can’t wait to get rid of them. I suspect that once the excess verbiage is gone I’ll actually have a decent story to work with.

And now comes the point where I realize I have less than 10,000 words to go, and a lot more than 10,000 words worth of story to write, and panic begins to gnaw at my belly. I’m not sure how I will fit it all in, but continuing past November 30 isn’t an option I want to entertain. Cass and I fly to Vancouver at 6AM on December 1. After that comes a month of catching up with family and friends, moving into a new house, unpacking, holidays and other distractions. Writing’s going to have to go on the back burner for a while.

One way or another, I have to get to the end by Tuesday.

The weather has been unseasonably warm on PEI. Yesterday Cassandra and I walked the boardwalk without hats or mittens. On the way home we jumped in leaves and I took this photo. It’s my inspiration right now. I’m nearing the end of my novel and it’s hard not to look back and see all the holes and loose ends I’ve left behind; all the awful, dull, dragging messes that need cleaning up. The closer I get to finishing, the harder it is to keep up the “complete literary abandon” the folks at NaNoWriMo encourage. When I forget, I look at this photo and remind myself to write with the same joyful spirit Cassandra displays here.

Halfway there! I will admit to some misery this week. My story is getting messy. I’m rambling. I’m tired. But I’m still on track. The novel’s now over 50K in total and I’m tumbling toward the end, so I hope the words will come more easily in the next two weeks.

I spent this afternoon writing with four other NaNoers at a local pub. In larger cities there are a multiplicity of NaNo write-ins and parties. Here on PEI we’ve only managed the one. But considering there are just 20 registered participants on the whole Island, it was a great turnout. It was nice to hang out with other writers who know what I’m going through, and to soak up the positive energy at the table.

I believe I’m actually going to finish this thing.

Today is a good day. It’s 1:30 and I’ve surpassed my daily word quota. Cassandra is napping. The apartment is quiet. I will now have a cup of tea and think of nothing.